Take a break from the children (as well as everyone else) and
cosy up in one of the secluded cabins dotted along this sliver of
Californian cliff. The 19th century homestead takes eco-luxe
seriously with solar panels, recycled-redwood lodges and the little
oases of green. Dine on summer truffles and artichoke ravioli in
the ranch-style Sierra Mar before heading outside wielding a
lavender martini for the best stargazing experience of your life –
there’s no kids menu here. Pro tip: For ultimate isolation, request
the Pfeiffer cabin. Perched at the end of the resort, the only
signs of life here are the hum of birdsong and the gentle lapping
of ocean waves.

Just one glimpse at colonial Coqui Coqui Valladolid is enough to
know that this is not a place where melted crayons and dirty feet
belong. Glide across tiled floors, beneath opulent chandeliers and
up an open-air staircase to a tranquil courtyard where a private
plunge pool looks over sleepy Yucatan life unwinding below. Set
atop Coqui Coqui’s flagship perfumery, there’s a heavenly fragrance
here (rest assured it stops well short of nauseating). The romantic
private residence offers just one suite with so there’s no need for
a “do not disturb” sign. Beneath a thatched roof is the hotel’s
spa, where an aloe vera healing ritual is strongly encouraged, if
not mandatory. Pro tip: Leave your Chanel No. 5 at home as you’ll
be trading in your signature scent for one of Coqui Coqui’s
perfumes; we’re partial to Rosas Frescas.

It goes without saying that kids are best left at home when
holidaying at a wine resort, but just to be safe Casa de Uco
specify have an over-16’s only policy (not quite adult, but we’ll
make do). Burrowed in a 790-acre vineyard estate, Casa de Uco
offers postcard-worthy views of orchard backdropped by snow-capped
Andean peaks. The hotel’s rural colour palette is toughened up with
concrete and steel, clean-cut modernism and industrial architecture
making the hideaway not so hidden. Rambles in the surrounding
vineyards are a foil for heady hangovers – as is a glass of Malbec
in the wine lounge. Pro tip: Ask for one of the lagoon-facing rooms
on the top floor where a bathtub (that fits two) sits directly by
the floor-to-ceiling windows, making for an especially picturesque
soak.

Masterminded by local architect Antonio Obrador, this once
desolate 19th-century military fortress has undergone a
reincarnation of phoenix-from-ashes proportions. Cap Rocat stands
on a private peninsula boasting commanding views over Palma Bay.
Spacious pathways – once serving as military barracks for young
Spaniards completing their national service – have been glammed up
to be one of the boutique hotel’s most enchanting features, along
with the grand stone bridge and colossal crenelated gates. Housed
within the formidable sandstone walls are 22 suites (of which our
favourite is Suite del Cabo) where charming four-poster beds, stone
sinks, Mallorca antiques and an overall feel of luxury clearly
demonstrate that this is not toddler terrain. Pro tip: Don’t check
out without having dined in one of Cap Rocat’s nooks carved
straight into the cliff face. Candle-lit and completely secluded,
these hideaways have seen their fair share of proposals.

Perching cliffside at 144 One Love Drive (yes really) is The Caves, the dreamy Jamaican resort to ruin all other resorts. The all-inclusive hotel is comprised of 12 thatched-roof lodgings – which range from cutesy cottages to uber-luxe – with two dining gazebos, a spa and rum bar dotted across the rock bed. While rooms are oasis-like in their wood furnishings, batik prints and island-inspired decor, the real allure lies beyond the walls. Platforms carved into the volcanic cliff edge (and expert staff are on-hand) so you can take a spectacular leap into the gem-toned waters below. Once adrenaline rush has subsided, strap on your snorkel and explore the coral reef before trying your hand at spearfishing.

Pro tip: In the mornings, embrace the island culture and skip the eggs ben in favour of a Jamaican style breakfast of savoury ackee and saltfish.

This 19th-century riad reads like British designer Jasper
Conran’s love letter to Marrakech, a passionate but refined
approach to old-school Moroccan glamour. Conrad’s aesthetic eye is
obvious in every inch of this period palace. Billowing curtains
cascade from double-height arches, rare artworks top even rarer
antique furniture, while vibrant zellige tiles and hand-loomed
carpets decorate floors. Thoughtfulness manifests in an abundance
of dates, fresh fruit and ear plugs laid out in your room – not
that you’ll need them, the hotel houses only five suites meaning
noise is kept to a minimum. Fresh mint teas and aperitifs are to be
taken on the roof terrace – time it with the call to prayer for
optimum atmosphere. Pro tip: The hotel may be crawling with
masterpieces but the pièce de résistance is its small but mighty
garden that bursts with lush greenery and flowers in bloom. Take a
dip in the saltwater lap-pool which is lit by lanterns and candles
after-hours.

This haven built by Australian billionaires has certainly not
been constructed with strollers and crying babies in mind.
Teetering above the Coral Sea, 60 hillside pavilions sprawl across
30 acres of tropical bushland. While Aussie culture is known to be
laid-back (and as expected the vibe here is distinctly relaxed),
the hotel’s attention to detail is anything but. Guest rooms
feature local hardwoods, quarried stone and some even have private
infinity pools. For dinner, Pebble Beach serves delectable dishes
of Euro-Asian cuisine against a backdrop so perfect it looks like a
green-screen. Pro tip: Don’t be fooled by the swimwear and
flip-flop dress-code, pack cocktail attire for night-caps beneath
twinkling stars on the open-air Long Pavillion.