Part of the Firmdale Hotels group, this place is like a quirky
country house slap bang in the middle of Soho. Owners Tim and Kit
Kemp indulged their every whim when it came to furnishing Ham Yard Hotel, meaning an XXL, slide-shaped
orange-juice maker, bronze sculpture by Tony Cragg and hand-painted
wallpaper were all deemed “necessities”. Rooms are kitted out with
high-framed beds, padded-linen walls and fluffy robes, while
bathrooms are stocked with RikRak (Kit’s bath and beauty range) –
the signature fragrance of which, Gardenia Greenleaf, has lasting
appeal. Soak in the tub until you turn prune-like – a common
side-effect of there being an Aqua TV docked at the foot of the
bath. Party person? Keep an ear out for the various pop-ups that
take place on the roof.

Proving that it’s not all about high-tech spas and gimmicky
gadgets, the first hotel from the Experimental Cocktail
Group is an elegant, 18-bedroom boutique stay that provides every
comfort. On arrival, drop your bags upstairs and make yourself at
home in the neoclassical terracotta-and-navy bar. If there’s one
thing the ECG knows how to do well, it’s cocktails: the list has
been expertly curated by several drink historians, who took
inspiration from the storied neighbourhood. Try the down and out
(gin, Lillet Blanc and crème de cassis), created as an ode to
George Orwell, who frequented this former publishing house. Or,
alternatively, try your hand at creating your own concoctions back
in your room (with a little help from the bedside recipe book),
before ordering a midnight snack – warm madeleines with a bucket of
chantilly cream, we’re looking at you.

Press the gilt buzzer to gain entry into the whacky Batty Langley – a labour of love that took 20
years to complete (and a vat of polish to get the antique furniture
looking pristine). Blending the grandeur of a posh private
residence with the eccentricity of a secondary school art teacher,
this Georgian mansion has been furnished with a wicked sense of
humour. Bookshelves conceal a gentleman’s throne and period-style
portraits displaying cheeky grins, while a snug sitting room offers
up over 3,500 books, alongside a well-stocked honesty bar. Bed down
in dark and decadent four-poster beds, draw the opulent gold
curtains and sleep in until noon – only moving to enjoy a soak in
your roll-top bath or to drape yourself on a mustard silk chaise
longue. The next morning, in true lord or lady of the manor
fashion, summon bacon-stuffed sarnies, buttery pastries and salmon
bagels to the boudoir.

The opening of a smattering of fab restaurants has seen a
resurgence in west London’s popularity, with thirtysomethings
making their way back from the capital’s east. Named after Rhaune
Laslett, a community activist and Notting Hill Carnival organiser,
this tiny boutique hotel combines the many hats that this postcode
wears, being much-storied, eclectic and creative. Bedrooms are
immaculately designed and feature a curated selection of pieces by
local artists, with classic English features like cubby-hole beds
dressed with sumptuous throws, freestanding baths and
black-and-white tiling. Spend hours browsing the gift shop – it’s
brimming with British design, art and books, which you’re
encouraged to peruse while perched on a velvet bench in The
Henderson Bar. The Laslett truly feels like a home-from-home, and is
a particularly nice option if you’re hankering after a much-needed
weekend of solo R&R.

A striking terracotta building standing proud in London’s
literary neighbourhood, Kimpton Fitzroy promises a staycation at its
most lavish (and learned). The interiors boast high ceilings,
marble pillars and a lot of gold – this is definitely the kind of
place where Gatsby would have thrown a party. While the restaurants
and lobby take their design cues from the building’s rich history,
the rooms follow a more modern style, though are no less luxe for
it, with their gargantuan beds and roll-top baths. The colossal
building houses four restaurants: meet friends for morning coffee
in Burr & Co, take brunch in the lush Palm Court, then knock
back some excellent oysters at Neptune. Later, head to dimly lit
Fitz’s to revel in salacious gossip, killer martinis and old-school
glamour.

One of two boutique hotels of the same name, The Zetter Townhouse in Marylebone is the
edgier sibling to its Clerkenwell counterpart. The 24-key Georgian
building exudes a warm grandiosity, making it feel more like the
country pile of an eccentric, wealthy relative than a hotel. The
decor is quintessentially British, with bedrooms featuring upcycled
antique church pews and kitsch Union Jack bunting over the
four-poster bed. The beautiful frescoed ceiling in the suites is a
lovely touch, as is the outdoor copper bathtub – perfect for a
late-night soak beneath the stars. Seymour’s Parlour is the
bar-come-restaurant; a lounge serving a delectable afternoon tea by
day, then, come sundown, the red-walled, art-filled salon assumes a
seductive air, serving masterful mixes courtesy of pioneering
drinks aficionados The Drink Factory.

Sitting pretty in Bloomsbury, L’Oscar’s distinctive architecture, style and
atmosphere reflect its idiosyncratic history. Originally the London
headquarters of the Baptist Church, the building was damaged by a
bomb in the Second World War. Now restored to its former glory,
original features including terracotta panels, ornately plastered
ceilings and carved fireplaces are complemented by contemporary
design. Over-the-top touches such as leather and velvet walls,
stylised peacock motifs and butterfly-wing taps are a nod to owner
Duncan Shakeshaft’s whimsical taste. The hotel’s self-professed
thespian nature is apparent in the bedrooms, where elaborate decor
reflects the Edwardian arts and crafts style, complete with marble
bathrooms and commissioned artworks, while the picturesque Grade
II-listed former chapel now hosts the Baptist Grill restaurant.

Inspired by the healing properties of its herbal namesake, The
Mandrake provides a soothing escape in central London. Luxurious
interiors showcasing dark wood and ornamental chandeliers harmonise
with a romantic central courtyard filled with hanging vines and
cascading jasmine. This spacious refuge from the West End further
benefits from high ceilings and huge windows. Suites are done up
with vintage light fixtures and fittings and freestanding bathtubs,
while the second floor is the place to explore exotic medicinal
plants in the in-house glasshouse. Come sunset, head to the
French-Spanish restaurant, before choosing between three bars for a
post-prandial drink. Waeska offers a botanical-based cocktail menu
founded on ethnobotany, while Jurema is located on a first-floor
terrace with exclusive guest access, and designed by world-famous
landscape architects Bureau Bas Smets.

The brainchild of New York hotelier Michael Achenbaum, The Curtain cost £70 million and took four whole years
to build, so you know it’s going to be good. Standing six storeys
high, this east London oasis climaxes in an impressive rooftop pool
with panoramic views of the city and reaches down into an urban
underbelly with a subterranean drinking den. While the name refers
to the 16th-century theatre that once stood across the road (and,
it’s claimed, held the first performance of Romeo and Juliet), we
like to think of it as a smokescreen for what goes on within. Live
music, low lighting and an air of naughtiness (which is hard to pin
down exactly) attracts movers and shakers from film, music and
fashion, attracted by the air of exclusivity combined
with a generous dollop of fun. The 120 guest rooms, including five
suites, sport a moody colour palette and sleek black-and-white
bathrooms.

Treehouse Hotel’s message is clear: life’s
simple pleasures can be enjoyed at any age, and simplicity doesn’t
have to cost an arm and a leg. True to its name, a treehouse theme
is evident from the moment you step into the bark-lined lift –
riding it feels as though you are ascending the inside of a tree
trunk – which carries you up to the 15th-floor reception. There,
walls are clad with reclaimed and recycled wood and plants burst
through gaps in the walls and cascade from ceilings. The hotel’s 95
bedrooms are brimming with quirky treehouse memorabilia, too, such
as brightly coloured bird boxes, cuckoo clocks and a tree trunk
spearing through the bathroom. Cuddle up with one of the soft toys
on the double bed and entertain yourself with the trinkets dotted
around the room, including magic eight balls and kaleidoscopes.

Located at the quieter end of Portobello Road, The Lost Poet is
so design-smart that it feels borderline futuristic. There’s no
marked entrance, or check-in desk, for that matter. Rather, a
digital key is sent to you after you’ve let yourself in via an app.
(Fear not: there are physical keys and a receptionist on hand for
the less tech-savvy.) Four bedrooms, sprawled across five floors,
are each playfully designed by the ridiculously talented Cubic
Studios – think Spanish tiling, hand-crafted wallpapers and walls
peppered with artworks by local creatives. We suggest seeking out
the two-floor penthouse, The Muse, partly for its generous
dimensions, but largely for its terrace, which overlooks the
street’s famous candy-coloured facades.